Hello Alison and thanks for these. It's a great idea to focus on one part of the essay at a time. Many people just practice by writing five or six bad complete essays, instead of fixing the problems they have with individual parts of the essay.

Overall, your intros are fine -  you just need more thesis sentences, and (sometimes) your opinion. A good intro

• gives the background or situation
• looks at both sides
• has an opinion
• outlines what the essay will do in a thesis sentence
• is short 

Some people think computer and Internet are important in children's study, but others think students can learn more effectively in schools and with teachers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

You wrote:

The development of computer and internet, in current world, is challenging the traditional way of education. Popular though it seems, this advanced technology cannot substitute the essential role of real classes, as for some individuals. In their opinion, children can perform better under the help of teachers.

Your introduction is OK and your opinion is clear, but where’s your thesis sentence? What are you going to do in this essay? Here is your paragraph, edited a little, and with a possible opinion and thesis sentence:

Computers and the internet are challenging traditional education. Popular though it seems, this advanced technology cannot substitute for the essential role of real classes for many individuals. In this essay, I will explain why I believe children can have a more enjoyable experience, be better motivated, and perform better with teachers.

Some people believe that teenagers should concentrate on all school subjects, while others claim that students should focus on the subject that they are best at or that they find interesting. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

You wrote:

Economic reality is hard, and job competition is harder. As a consequence, a vast number of people believer that students should devote themselves to all subjects in order to become versatile. Others, however, completely disagree with this assertion. They contend that teenagers should be free to immerse themselves in the things they like.

Again, what are you going to do in this essay?  A good thesis sentence concentrates your mind on what the layout and organization of the essay will be.  It also guides readers -  they can anticipate what you are going to say.

The first sentence is also a little broad -  could you get to the point more quickly or mention students or subjects in the first sentence?

Should students study a large range of subjects in school? Many people believe that in order to become versatile and compete in the job market, students should be made study a fixed range of subjects. Others, however, contend that teenagers should be free to immerse themselves in the things they like. In this essay, I will look at some of the benefits of allowing freedom of choice in school / In this essay, I will look at some of the disadvantages of allowing students to choose what they want / In this essay, I will look at some of the advantages and disadvantages of forcing one curriculum down all students’ throats.  

In countries where there is a high rate of unemployment, most pupils should be offered only primary education. There is no point in offering secondary education to those who have no hope of finding a job. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

You wrote:

I completely disagree with these people who claim that it is pointless to provide some certain pupils with secondary education. This phase of education is crucial to all the public. Without it, the employment rate is only expected to decline. In my essay, I will outline my reasons and give my analyses.

 Good -  I like it, especially the nice short second sentence.  I would make the last sentence more specific to the topic. At the moment. it could be used in almost ANY essay.

In my essay, I will outline the need for secondary education for all students.

Some people think museums should be enjoyable places to attract and entertain young people. Other think the purpose of museums is to educate, not to entertain. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

You wrote:

Traditionally, museums are built to educate the public. People believe they can lift their spirit and be nourished within the museums. However, time is changing. More and more young people are getting bored with the serious atmosphere there. Thus, some people propose that museums should be transformed into entertaining spots.

Again it’s fine, but needs a thesis sentence and YOUR opinion!

• In this essay, I will say why some change to our museums is good, but also warn of the need for caution.
• In my opinion, museums do need to change in order to meet the needs of the a changing population
• This essay will ask if dumbing-down our museums really helps the public

It has been believed that people reading for pleasure have developed better imagination and language skills than people who prefer to watch TV. Do you agree or disagree?

 You wrote:

Reading, as a means of enhancing one’s language skill, is favored by many people. They think that it can also stimulate creativity and imagination, thus claim reading is a more effective way of acquiring knowledge than television.

Here my reaction is about the idea, not your English. Do many people sit down and say “Now, I would like to improve my language skill – how can I do it? Ah, yes -  I’ll read a book” or do most people read simply because they enjoy it? 

Again, just add a thesis sentence of some kind.  I am not a fan of ‘thus’ and would ban it from any student’s toolbox immediately.

Many people enjoy reading as a means of enhancing their language skill. They feel that reading stimulates their creativity and imagination more effectively way than does watching television. In this essay, I will outline why television can actually limit our imagination and reduce our vocabulary.

Some people believe that time spent on television, video and computer games can be valuable for children. Others believe this has negative effects on a child. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

You wrote:

Some recreation, such as watching television or playing computer games, is a good way for children to release themselves from the strain. With no doubt, they can profit from these activities. However, when relaxing student’s mind, some entertainment does negatively affect them in some way.

Again, add a thesis sentence. Here’s your intro with some edits.

Recreation such as watching television or playing computer games is a good way for children to release the stress and strain from schoolwork. However, some programs and online games can also affect them negatively. This essay will ask if parents should be more careful with what they allow their children to watch or play.

Today’s children are living under more pressure from the society than children in the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

You wrote:

Competition is extremely stiff today. Children need to make great effort to win their places in universities. It reflects on the huge stress that they have, which is much greater than the past-time children had.

Here are a couple of other versions:

Competition for university places is extremely stiff today, and children need to make great effort to obtain places. This is reflected in higher levels of stress for many children than in the past. In this essay, I will compare the relaxed life of children a generation ago with today’s stressful childhoods. / In this essay, I will suggest ways of allowing our children to grow up in a supportive and non-stressful environments

Great work, Alison, thanks!

You can read more about introductions here 

Hi Alison

I think there is no disadvantage and a lot of advantages to giving your opinion in the intro.  It helps the reader, it avoids suspense, and it means if you run out of time to finish your essay in the exam, at least your opinion is clear.

The biggest advantage, however, is that giving your opinion in the introduction concentrates your mind. Having it up there at the top of the page means there is no way to change. Many candidates change their mind half way through the essay, and sometimes even back again.  There is definitely no penalty for putting it in the intro, so why not try it?

Note too that giving your opinion doesn’t always mean using the words ‘believe’ or ‘think’ or ‘in my opinion’. You can give it like this:

Studying overseas is exciting and can be very rewarding, but it comes with many challenges. This essay will discuss why studying overseas may not be suitable for all students.

Here’s another

Arranged marriages are regarded by many as being old-fashioned, oppressive, and unromantic. However, many young people are very happy that their families will help them to make one of the most important decisions in their lives.  In  this essay I will look at some of the real issues involved in arranged marriage and explain why we should not reject it out of hand. 

Hi Alison

Thanks very much! Congratulations on doing the test. Take a few days off away from books and studying! 

Sorry to hear about the 220 words. The requirement is for 250, as you know, so there will be a penalty of some kind. There's obviously no point in worrying now about it, though. I hope the quality of the writing and ideas will make up for any slight penalty. Was the topic interesting or puzzling?

It's good for other people reading here to realize that it's tough to write 250 good words and paragraphs at the end of a long stressful day in just 40 minutes by hand. Who writes by hand nowadays?  My hand gets sore after just a few sentences!

Advice to anyone doing the exam soon: Leave the computer and sit down and try some of the topics here by hand in exactly 40 minutes and see how tough it is. It doesn't matter whether you are a native speaker or a learner. 

So cheer up Alison and thanks for all your contributions. Please let us know in two weeks how you did! 

Good luck!