Hi Tnduong!

Your essays are getting better! Only a few points here:

Word Choice/Usage

• Living standard is improving  → the standard of living in many countries is improving  OR living standards are improving
• Advertising… influences to their spending → advertising influences their spending.
• Lone of the most common methods that companies usually use is testimonials. → One of the most common…
• All of things they eat, drink or use are coped by young people. → All of the things they eat, drink or use are copied by young people
• David Beckham brought a huge profit to the cooperation. → David Beckham brought a huge profit to the corporation.   
• In fact, we still live in a healtier way without this beverage → In fact, we would be healthier without this beverage.

Agreement

• Advertising becomes more powerful and create high sales → Advertising becomes more powerful and creates high sales
• It can brings negative consequences to many people → It can bring negative consequences to many people

Specify

Make sure every sentence is related to the topic, and is NOT a generic phrase you could use in a million essays. You have almost got it right! 

This essay will discuss both sides of this viewpoint, focusing on the role of advertisement.

Here’s a possible rewrite:

This essay will discuss some of the benefits and disadvantages of advertising.

Paragraph Two

The first part of paragraph two is very good. However, the second part needs some work. There are some problems with pronoun reference. You wrote:

Second, people are the person who have abilities to control their money. I believe that no one can force a person spend their money or not. Thus, advertising also can not have this ability in some cases. He most important thing is they have to control themselves.

Here are the same sentences, tidied up a little:

Second, people should control their spending. I believe that nothing – not even advertising - can force a person to spend their money. The most important thing is for people to be responsible for themselves.

Comma Splice

Don’t use commas to join sentences which should be separate

• Advertising is one of the main reasons that influences to their spending, it not only provides information about products but als.. →
  Advertising is one of the main reasons that influences their spending. It not only provides information about products but also…

Conclusion

Your conclusion is fine, but do you really think companies are going to think about the benefits for their consumers first before profits?

Well done again, and keep working!